A Kiss without the Squeeze

Dear Miss Moore,

I once grounded a catboat. Couldn’t sail to weather. It was a date. I brought along a dog I rescued on the way. The man who rescued us was called John. The boat, Peggotty. I do not remember the date. The dog was with me just long enough to be sick as I removed the porcupine quills from her nose. Painful barbs. Her family was very poor. I never knew her name.

I baked our hero a pie and offered him cheddar. An option to which he replied, “A pie without cheese is like a kiss without the squeeze.”

Do you agree? I prefer mine plain. I love apples and a fine pastry. Dairy just complicates things.

I am nervous about your visit, am a nervous hostess, am a bit sick that I gave away the hostess pants I found in a San Francisco thrift shop. They were spectacular. They would have been perfect.

Oh, Miss Moore, I do hope you will be pleased.

Sincerely,